Hi,
This is a bit of a broad question to cover here but........... I supply and support both Cisco and 3CX voice systems. On one hand Nobody ever got fired for buying Cisco on the other hand it can be expensive in comparison to other solutions. The previous post suggests a 2800 based Cisco option, I entirely agree that it is an excellent and versatile product but even more expensive and can be a challenge to configure without a high degree of expertise.
The 3CX offers very good value for money and is extremely easy to setup even with little or no previous IPT experience. You mention the need to buy a server for 3CX, this is not strictly necessary for a small to medium system as it will run quite happily on XP. In addition to the server/XP machine you will need a gateway to interface your 4 phone lines to the 3CX and I would recommend the Paton 4114 (I am assuming that your incoming lines are analog). For the fax line you can either leave it connected to the existing fax machine of use the 3CX fax server to distribute incoming faxes via email. You can add SIP (VoIP) lines to the 3CX without any additional gateway. The only other equipment you will need is IP phones (make sure they are on 3CXs supported list, it makes configuration easier) and possibly a PoE switch if you do not want individual power supplies for each phone.
Hope this answers some of your questions and goes some way to assist with your decision.
Best regards & good luck.